These days I don’t feel like I have a lot that I want to say. I do, but I don’t. I could talk forever about the traumas, the frustrations, and the sadness in our world today. I could rant and rave about the great injustices. I could cry and grieve over the conditions of others trapped in such despair and poverty. I could talk about the beauty of music and nature and fill my conversation with inspirational quotes and lengthy descriptions of emotion. There are endless conversations to be had and words to be written, but in the end a conversation is just a conversation. Words are powerful, but they lose their meaning if they’re not followed by action.
I find myself in a life situation, where I want to be acting rather than talking; doing rather than watching. I am restrained, constrained, contained. I want to be out running, doing and going. So much of what I am right now has to be “responsible” when what I really want to be is revolutional (which, technically, is not a word, yet). I want to be out there doing what I know I am meant to do, not sitting here being “responsible” so that I can climb the ladder of cultural and societal success. I’m not made for that.
I don’t want to be defined by the Western definition of success that so many around me accept and compete for. I don’t want to be a part of the so called “dream” society where everything is for material gain and “getting ahead.” Yes, we strive to do our best, to take care of what we need to, to be responsible, but I don’t want to define my best by cultural standards or my responsibility by the current trends.
From where I stand, in the cultural pursuit of “the dream”, we have lost the most important thing in the process, relationships. We have forgotten about the people. We have forgotten that life is precious and that love is important; that happiness is not bought and morality isn’t old fashioned. I don’t want to forget these things. I don’t want to lose sight of them. I do not want to participate in tearing them down; especially, by doing the accepted and “culturally normal.”