There is so much bubbling up. So many thoughts vying for my attention. Good thoughts mostly, but mixed in with those thoughts are the ones that bring reality front and center. All of them happen to move together in some sort of thoughtful dance. It is beautiful and frustrating all at once.
It’s funny. I’ve thought about trying to ignore my thoughts. I imagine that I’m good at it. I can think them and then pass them on by, but they always get annoyed that I’ve ignored them and come back later when I have nothing else to think about. I then retry to ignore them and the cycle continues. I guess I’m not so good at permanently ignoring them as I once thought.
But you know, I don’t think I like that anymore. I think I want to take each thought and grab hold of it. Ignoring them is a full time job and only brings sleepless nights. I’m tired of sleepless nights plagued by recurring thoughts. It gets old.
Silly me is now trying to figure out how to methodically think through each of these thoughts that I’ve ignored. I want to pay attention to each one, slowly and clearly. Putting them into some sort of organized and logical process just puts my head in a spin, but it desperately needs to happen. So, the question I’m left with is “how?”
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